Birthdays

This is the month of birthdays in our family. Both boys have birthdays in November. I think it is no coincidence that their birthdays fall in the month where we give thanks. I'm so grateful for them. Both of their births have been miraculous and I wonder quite often what I would do without them. They are my life. Listening to their happy laughter brings me the greatest happiness I could ever imagine. Seeing them learn something new is better than learning everything there is to know myself. Watching them show kindness is the best payment I could every receive. Here is a poem I wrote that I hope captures the essence of what I am trying to say.

Give a kind word to my own dear one,
and my heart swells with thanks to you.
Better than any gift you could have given,
You made my child smile and be glad.
A smile in them is a smile in me,
eternally ingrained in my heart.
Yes, I will be forever indebted to you,
for each kindness you show to my child.

I think that's what being a mother is about. Your heart is never all your own again. In it, there are sections for each of your children. When they are happy, your joy is full. When they are going through trials and troubles, you go through them too. Their pain is your pain and their joy yours. It's hard to watch them go through tough things, it hurts to see them hurt. It's painful to see the effects of their wrong choices. Motherhood is a rocky path. I'm grateful for all of those angels out there who make my job easier. I've met angels in the grocery store who give my children a smile or say a kind word. I know some angel teachers who lift and build up my children's confidence and self-esteem. My children have angel grandma's and grandpa's who send them letters and e-mails, encouraging them and inspiring them. I'm grateful for every smile, every kind word, every act of service, every lesson, and every gift of time you've ever given or will give to my children. My heart is full of gratitude for all of the many blessings that I have - especially for you my dear friends and family.

Thankful for My Life

I feel the need to ramble again. This month is thanksgiving and I'm so thankful for all of my many blessings. It's easy to get caught up in the things that are "undone" and "imperfect" and "less than complete". I have a lot of those things. I have an everlasting laundry pile that seems like it appears the moment I make it disappear. I have imperfect children with an imperfect mother to mother them. I have a to do list that has things on it that have been there for over a year now. I have picture frames that have out-of-date pictures and some with no pictures at all. I have dust bunnies and smudged windows, toy chaos and escape-artist chickens. I'm sadly in need of a haircut and wear pants that are a size too large. Yeah I have all of that and more. But you know what I have? I have a child who writes me notes like this one:

"I love you Mom Love C We thenk that you ar the best."

and even better writes his brother notes like this one:

"I love you J and I thenk that you ra the best. Love C"

I have a husband who does the dishes for me and makes me dinner every Sunday night. I have a warm home and food on my table every meal. I have a healthy body that allows me to go about my day without pain. I have a child to play cars with every morning while his brother goes to school. I have kind neighbors who bring me cupcakes, neighborhood kids who call me "Mom", and good friends near and far. I am so blessed! And I'm thankful for my life. I really do have it all.

Halloween Fun

For Halloween this year Curious George is a Green Dinosaur and Jesse Bear is a Green Monster. CG had a Halloween program for kindergarten this week. It was adorable - all the kids were dressed up in their costumes. Today the Mom of the girl sitting next to C in the program talked to me and told me that her daughter thinks C is her boyfriend. In the program when they got bored after like 10 minutes, they started measuring their costumes to see whose horns were the biggest. It was really cute.

At another point they were both picking their noses. When the Mom asked her daughter why they were both picking her noses the girl said, "See Mom, we're perfect for each other!" :)

Here is the green monster doing gymnastics at his class this week:

Potty Training

Jesse Bear is almost completely potty trained now - it happened a lot faster than I thought it would. Here's a cute shot of him washing his hands and getting a drink while he's at it. :)

Love One Another

I loved this little ceramic doodad when I saw it first at my sister's house. A few weeks later I was shopping and saw it and had to buy it. We happened to be remodeling our bathroom at the time and I had the perfect shelf to put it on. It's sat there fairly untouched for about a year. Then when I was dusting a few months ago my arm bumped it and it fell and broke into three pieces on our bathroom tile floor. At first I was heart-broken (silly, huh?) and it was all I could do to pick up the pieces and set them aside. For a few days they sat there and I cringed every time I saw them. Finally after a few days the thought came to me that I could glue it back together. I used some ceramic glue and rubber bands and the next day it was whole again (although not without scars).

Today as I was looking at it, the thought came to me that maybe I like it a little better the way it is now:

I think the reason I like it a little better is because it more closely represents real life, especially family life. We love one another and then something happens - maybe a trial, maybe a hurtful or unkind word, maybe a mistake or a sin. Our love sometimes gets broken. It hurts to think about it, so we just set it aside for a little while. After a while (minutes, hours, days, weeks or years sometimes) we start to patch it back together until it's whole again. We have scars, but we've forgiven and we love again.

And after a while...we think to ourselves, maybe I like it a little better the way it is now. The thing about love is it it grows with each forgiven mistake and strengthens through each trial endured.

Angelus

This is the painting we chose to hang on our newly remodeled kitchen wall. It was painted by Jean-Francois Millet and entitled "Angelus" or the painting of a prayer. I found this site that gave the description of this painting from a sales catalogue when it was up for auction in 1899:

The night is coming: the sun, already below the horizon, is still shining with a warm and golden light on the lower part of the sky and the vast cultivated plain that stretches away as far as the horizon.

The countryside is already radiating the mysterious quietness coming with the end of the day.

On the foreground, in a potato field that they are harvesting, two young people, a young peasant and his companion, have interrupted their work. They are standing up and out against the bright sky. The young man has taken his hat off and his pose expresses a feeling of innocent and touching respect. His is holding his beret in his hands on his chest and his head is bowed. The young girl is joining her hands up close to her face. The two of them are bending their heads; they are meditating and praying to the Creator silently. Actually the Angelus is ringing in the distance, from the steeple of the village church that can be seen on the horizon on the bright sky golden with sunset.

A deep religious feeling radiates from this famous painting that is said to be the most beautiful painting of the modern school and that is undoubtedly the masterpiece of Jean-Francois Millet."

The Angelus was the ringing of the church bell every morning, mid-day and evening. The faithful would stop at the sound of the tolling bell and pray. I love the message of the painting - a poor couple hard at work, stopping near the end of the day, interrupting their work to call upon God. I hope that when I look at it, I can remember to call upon my Heavenly Father and thank him for all of my many blessings.

New Profile

I'm excited to announce that I have recently created a profile on Mormon.org! You can check it out by following this link or click on the "I'm a Mormon" button to the left on this blog. If you have any questions about our religion and beliefs, feel free to make a comment and I'll try to answer as best as I can!